Did You Miss Me?

I know it has been a few months since my last post.  And I have been scolded and asked what is new, so I'm FINALLY taking the time to let you know.  Since that last doctors visit on January 7th, I've done NOTHING to do with fertility.  It has been an amazing change.  2013 was going to be a new year, but I just didn't realize how! (and we're only 1/3 way through)

On January 8th, I started a 6 week boot camp with my mom.  I really didn't know what to expect but after the first week, I realized that I was going to get my ass kicked!! But I needed to start losing weight, eating healthy and change my lifestyle.  I found after two weeks of:
1) no fertility drugs
2) exercise
3) eating healthy
I FELT GREAT!! I was feeling myself and not that crazy/fat/hormonal self! I realized how out of shape I was and started to really be mindful of what I put in my body and I changed my lifestyle!  Here are the "BEFORE" pictures that Cole took of me on January 8th:

Notice how heavy my face looks! And my shorts are skin tight on my legs.  And my gut hangs out over my boobs! Not pretty!! I had hid behind the idea that I was trying to get pregnant so why try to lose weight for WAY TOO LONG!  and when I looked at these pictures after Cole took them, I thought to myself -- what have you done to yourself?? Well three months later (two 6-week boot camps)  I am feeling pretty good about myself! I'm not even half way there and am starting to realize it's going to be about a year before I'm where I want to be, but I'm still feeling so much better about myself just from getting off the couch and working out! 

So if you notice - shorts are lose! There is space between my legs and the shorts! I only have one chin and my boobs stick out more than my gut!! I haven't lost as much in lbs but I have lost inches like crazy!! I seriously have a pile of "fat clothes" that don't fit me anymore!! (I'm saving them for when I get pregnant)

Now all I need to do is get a tan (Fat always looks better when it's tan!!)

Here are some of the areas I've lost:
Weight - 7.6 lbs
Chest/Rib - 0.5"
Arms - 1"
Waist (around BB) - 2.5"
Abs (2" below BB) - 4"
Hips - 3"
Thighs - 0.75"

Sorry this blog is bragging but I'm just so proud of how far I've come! And I am so excited to keeping getting healthier! I've always loved myself for who I am, but I'm loving a smaller, tighter me too!!

So I'm getting healthy and losing weight but every month when I get my period my heart is heavy.  I haven't given up on the idea of having a baby, but I just couldn't keep going down the path I was going down. 

One of my mom's Aunts called me a couple of weeks ago and gave me her daughters number.  She went to a holistic doctor and swears that is what got her pregnant.  I have a family friend who is a chiropractor and has also reached out to me about making an appointment with him to see how he can help.  I love the support that I've gotten from this blog.  And everytime I'm out on the town, it's so much better because of this blog.  Instead of asking me why Cole and I haven't "popped one out" yet they are now going, is there alcohol in that glass?? and then they smile... because they are there with me on this journey! So thank you to all my friends and family for ALL the support you've given me! I couldn't do it without you!!  Here's to losing more lbs and inches!!

Set Backs

So I started my cycle on Saturday, January 5th and as I said on my last blog post, I had to go in on days 2, 3 or 4 of my cycle to have initial testings done and start the Tetrozole on day 3.  So Monday (the 7th) I went in to have the tests done.  They wanted to do another ultrasound and found that the ovulation cysts on my ovaries hadn't decreased enough in size.

I don't think I've explained exactly how an egg is made or released for ovulation.  So what happens in weeks 1 and 2 of your cycle your ovaries create cysts and the cysts produce an egg and when they get the LH surge on day 14 of the cycle, they release the egg and the cyst dissolves. 

My cysts are abnormally large and do not dissolve.  When I had my ultrasound on Monday, Dec. 31st there was a cyst on both ovaries (that is why the assume I ovulated from both ovaries) and when I went back in on Monday, Jan. 7th, the cyst on my left ovary had dissolved but the cyst on my right ovary went from 24.2 to 15.4 units.  They have a policy that they do not do the treatment if the cysts are larger than 14 units, and even though it decreased by 8.5 units, it was still too large to do the treatment this month.  They said because its size decreased, they aren't too alarmed but want to keep an eye on it. 

I still have my doctor's appointment with Dr. Phipps on Monday, Jan. 28th to decide next steps.  We will also see what my ovaries and/or cysts are up to again at that time.  My second prolactin test results still came back a little elevated so we will discuss next steps with the doctor at that time as well. 

So January is a month of waiting.  It's really frustrating for me that things just can't go right for me! I'm not stressing about it as much as I did in the beginning but I still just can't help feeling hopeless and like it's never going to happen.  I am also nervous about my doctor's appointment because if he has bad news, I'm going to lose it! Every test that comes back normal just means that it's something worse. Cole has been amazing at trying to brighten my spirits and positively states that we're gonna get pregnant this month with no help or treatments! I hope he's right... If not, February we will hopefully be cleared for Tetrozole and we are thinking more seriously about insemination.

As always, thank you for reading my blog and for all your prayers, thoughts and kind words!

New Year, New Changes

Hope everyone had a wonderful New Year! 2013 is going to be my year!! Lucky 13

I had an appointment with a Nurse Practioner at the Reproductive Medicine Center on Monday, Dec. 31st.  We went over all my medical history and Cole's history, had an ultrasound done and did some blood work.  There was a lot that we talked about and a lot of information thrown at us so I'm going to try to keep it all straight!

- The ultrasound showed that I ovulated out of both my right and left ovaries this month which means that they are working so that is a good sign! When I took a blood pregnancy test though it was negative, meaning something still isn't working.  So we dodged the "twins-bullet" this month! But she said that my uterun wall is thick and healthy.

- She also said that it is really uncommon to be on Clomid for as long as I have been and told me to stop so that will be nice to feel a little more normal.

- I should be getting my period in the next day or so, and I will be starting a new treatment.  I will be starting Letrozole which is considered a "back door" drug that hasn't been approved by the FDA for infertility but has shown great results.  And it has less side effects than Clomid so thats good. They will also monitor me in greater detail, I have to go in on day 2,3 or 4 of my cycle to have some more tests done, and then also on day 12 to be tested for ovulation.  We then have the option of being inseminated when we do ovulate but its $800 out of pocket (looking in to see if insurance covers it) and that it doesn't greatly increase our chances but it does increase our chances.  We may just try this drug this month and do natural conception and if it doesn't work we may try insemination in February or March. 

- She also looked at Cole's results and stated that though it is considered in the normal range, it is in the low end.  She has suggested Cole go on a diet but doesn't think its necessary to medicate him at this time.

- We also met with a financial advisor and she gave us some prices (out of pocket) for our next steps in our goal to have a baby and let me say, not cheap!! But they do have payment plans if we need to, which is nice.

- I also had bloodwork done, as did Cole.  Cole gets a little whoozy around human blood so they made him lay down in the recliner in case he passed out! But he took it like a champ! I sat up like a big girl because blood doesn't scare me, just don't like how the needle hurts!! I gave 5 viles of blood for 8 tests to be done.  She wanted to check my thyroid again, it was still normal.  My pregnancy test was negative but if I don't get my period in a week, I'm supposed to retake the test.  My progesterone level was good. They also tested for a hormone called Prolactin, which causes irregular ovulation cycles and it came back slightly elevated.  She wants me to be tested again when I come in on cycle day 2, 3 or 4 just to make sure it wasn't a fluke.  We will go over next steps after those test results.  Still waiting on results of the other tests they had done.

- I also made an appointment with a specialist for the end of January, after my first cycle of Letrozole to have them look at my response to the drugs, etc.  But hopefully we cancel that appointment because I'm pregnant! Staying positive!

- We also talked about positivity and dealing with the stress of all of this and I am going to make an appointment with a counselor to help with this struggle.  This blog has helped me greatly but sometimes professional help is necessary.

- I still haven't made an appointment for acupuncture, going to hold off on that for now! But I am re-starting my 17 day diet on Monday (1/7) and starting bootcamp two days a week to help get back into shape. 

Thank you for reading my blog and please say a prayer for the new year that brings new and exciting things for me and Cole! And hope 2013 treats you all well too!!